Essentially the way to change autonomic activation is to teach the client to breathe and still the mind. I prefer RSA breathing, which focuses on exhaling very slowly and counting the seconds mentally, trying to completely empty the lungs in 7 seconds. Then let the air come back in and continue counting, usually for 3 seconds.

That has several effects:

1. It eventually (over several breaths) improves the turnover of O2 and CO2 in the lungs, especially oxygenating the bottom third of the lungs, which often doesn’t happen with rapid or shallow breathing related to sympathetic (fight-or-flight) states. When the body–and especially the brain–are under-oxygenated, they have every right to consider that a potential emergency.

2. Maintaining the count and focusing out of one’s head (on the belly and the breath) break up the chattering of the so-called “monkey mind”; asking the client to also count the number of breaths (on his/her fingers) quickly makes it clear when thinking has re-started and interrupted the focus.

3. Slowing breaths to six times a minute activates the vagus nerve and shifts the ANS to parasympathetic mode.

You can use technologies like peripheral biofeedback (finger temperature, GSR, etc.) to demonstrate to the client that results are happening in the body. Heart-Rate Variability is another, currently more popular, way of doing the same thing. I use diving in the LIFE game to demonstrate the change. I ask a client to try any of these without suggesting any approach. Often the result is frustrating and disappointing. Then I teach the breathing technique and ask them to close their eyes and focus on counting the breaths. Usually within 15-30 seconds I can pause the display and ask them to open their eyes to see the dramatic change that has occurred in the game’s display. I ask them if they notice a change in how they feel, in the noisiness of their mind. Then we return to the feedback.

Doing this in sessions is helpful, but if the client is really motivated, I ask him/her to practice it 4-6 times a day (or more if they wish) for 2-3 minutes each time. “You’re going to be breathing anyway,” I tell them. “Just pay attention to it. Slow it down. Empty and fill your lungs. Keep your mind from thinking.”

I suggest that, since parasympathetic mode is related to body maintenance, they set up triggers to remind themselves to do the breathing. When they wake up in the morning, start the day, sitting on the side of the bed, with three minutes of breathing, before each meal, when they go to the bathroom, before going to bed at night. I point out to them that they can do the breathing with eyes open and no-one even knows they are doing it. But it moves the body into a state wherein it can perform its functions more effectively. And each time they breathe, they are dropping their stress levels back down several notches, so 4-6 times during the day can have a significant impact on how stressed they are by the time they go to bed. It’s also a great time to practice when you are driving a car (not with eyes closed). Focus on the breathing and you will drive calmer and safer. The same effect occurs if you breathe consciously when you are in a situation where you are feeling attacked by a boss or family member, etc. You can hear what the person is saying without exploding into an angry response which probably makes resolution less likely.

Each time the client comes for a session, I ask for a report on how many times they did the breathing since the last session, when they did it, what they noticed.

These are techniques to help shift the balance of time spent in sympathetic and parasympathetic, and that can begin to change the brain’s habitual level of autonomic tone.

Stress

Another thing I ask the client to do is to identify areas of stress. Stress, I explain to him/her, is an internal response to a situation where you feel the need to control something more than you can. Learning to accept that most of what happens outside ourselves is also outside our control is an important step. Whenever a person begins to feel stressed, I ask that they ask a simple question: Can I control this? Traffic? No. Political situation? No. Children’s behavior, especially as they grow older? No. Spouse or friends or service-givers, etc.? No. So what you can’t control, you deal with. Not getting angry or stressed out makes it a great deal easier to deal with what’s in front of you. In my experience, I tell them, people who are least able to control themselves are the ones who most want to control everything else. It’s a huge waste of emotional energy that is almost guaranteed to produce negative outcomes. We look at different stressful situations they identify and have them imagine how they could respond differently and how that might change the outcome. This can be done during sessions, while training.

But the bottom-line problem is that the brain has established a strategy for dealing with situations in certain ways. Those strategies are encoded in the energy patterns the brain produces. You can keep turning off the response (if you practice enough), but the brain will go back to it. So, the brain training is about guiding the brain to releasing its habitual responses and shifting to more effective ones. The more the client learns to make conscious and change those reactions, the more it practices reducing the level of autonomic tone, the easier these changes in habit patterns become. But in my opinion, the most efficient and effective way to achieve a lasting positive change is to combine them all–reduce tone, make controlling decisions more conscious and release old energy habits.